Visits From Family and Friends

Ryan asks:

What are the rules about having someone on board the ship that you know? For instance, if someone you know books a cruise just because you are working on it, are you allowed to fraternize with them at all, or are the rules aboard very strict?

I’m not certain what the official rules on this are, but I know how it’s gone for me. My parents came out for a cruise when I played keys in the show band. I was nervous about going into their room, but I did it now and then. There’s no problem with hanging out with them – and I ate every meal and went everywhere on the ship with them, but things get sticky when you go into their room. Remember that there are surveillance cameras all over these new ships.

I saw on my most recent ship that you can ask for special permission when you have friends or family on – special permission to enter their room, etc. The Hotel Director lets Surveillance and Security know about it, and you won’t have any trouble.

There’s two things here to keep in mind. The anti-fraternizing rules are mostly to prevent sexual harassment and sexual assault lawsuits against the cruise lines. The rumor is that passengers have come on ships and purposely become involved with crew members in order to later call it inappropriate and sue the pants off the cruise line.

So if your family comes on…it would be hard to argue that harassment would be a valid concern. If it’s your girlfriend/boyfriend – well, it depends on what the ship decides I guess.

Second, whoever is coming probably would never have bought the ticket unless you were there. Ships and supervisors should, and in my view usually do, understand that and respect this. All crew members, from the captain to the deck hand, miss their family and friends back home and are sympathetic to this kind of situation.

I would recommend you do everything above the table – get this permission from your supervisor instead of trying to sneak around. Talk to your music director and cruise director before anybody buys a ticket. Feel out the situation and you might feel better about it.